A Changed Life is Coming...

I am visiting North Carolina this weekend to see my boyfriend who goes to school up here and to visit the school I will be transferring to in the fall semester.

I was on the plane last night, descending into Charlotte around 9:00pm. If you've ever flown with me, you probably know that I will give you my first born and my left shoe just to sit at the window. I love the window. But more than that, I hate being in the aisle. (Center of gravity when turning mid flight, seeing the ground, etc.) I love watching the ground moving slowly below me. At night, my favorite thing about a window seat is the twinkling lights. If I could come back in my next life as a pile of glitter, I probably would. I love anything twinkly or sparkly.

As I was watching the cars creep along the highway, some people rushing to get home because they are hungry, some meandering and just driving as much as it takes for little Johnny to fall asleep, some coming home from work, some going to work, and watching the silent manic police car pull someone over, the entire world just continuing below me as I, the silent plane in the sky, flew right over them. They don't know me. I don't know them. But we could see each other and know, someone is there. Someone is living their hectic life below me... and to me, they're just a cruising ball of light among hundreds. I could feel my world shifting in that moment.

I'm moving hundreds of miles away from a home that I've considered sacred and secure for 22 years to a 2x3ft room with concrete walls and a campus of which I know one person. At once, I was paralyzingly terrified and so excited that I could have peed myself.  So many things are changing within the next 4 months, and when those 4 months are up, I will just be getting started.

I had to center myself when I had this thought because it scared me so much. I thought "Jesus Christ in a Chicken Basket. Millions of people have done what I'm doing and have done far worse. Chill, Erin."

I thought back to a flight I took in December from Jacksonville, FL to Dallas, TX, to Seattle, WA. On my flight from Dallas to Seattle, I sat next to a really nice girl who told me her final destination was Alaska - home. She was a student in Texas and hadn't been home for 4 months. Thinking back to this made me realize how easy this should be... at least I'm not moving across an entire country.

Whether or not I'm ready for this, it's happening. I am going to force myself to go on this amazing adventure because I can only grow and learn from it. There's no going back now.

My life is changing whether I like it or not.

And I think I'll like it.